26 minutes, or I just don't feel like it

To be perfectly honest, I've been on the couch since 7:30. I've gotten up to pee once, and I've gotten up to put a DVD in once. I can get away with this because my husband is at work until midnight. On nights when he works, I can do whatever I want. I spent the evening laying on the couch. I ate a dinner that was part mac and cheese, part pasta and tomatoes (there weren't enough of either to make a full meal, so I alternated between the two), with some palate cleansing Thin Mints in between. I watched the movie Wonder Boys since I finished reading the book on Wednesday, in anticipation of Book Club. Then I fucked around on the internet some and halfway watched "Florida's Top 10 Beaches" on the Travel Channel. Now I'm watching Most Haunted on the Travel Channel and wondering why British people are so much better at sounding ominous than Americans. I think both of these shows are idiotic*, but I'm watching them, fucking around on the internet some more, and decidedly not done any of the simple tasks my husband has requested that I do. He's asked me to wash some socks for him and iron a shirt and two ties.
What I've failed to mention so far is that I walked in the door at 12:20 this afternoon and saw my husband sitting on the couch in a t-shirt and boxers staring catatonically at the blank, silent television. Papers were strewn all over the entranceway, and the baby was sitting on the floor, wearing his pajama shirt and mismatched sweatpants, smiling and waving a tampon as though it was the Olympic torch. It had clearly been a rough morning. I thought: When he goes to work, I will clean the house so he has a nice, calm environment to return to. Maybe if it's neat in the house when he comes home, he won't feel stressed about not yet finishing Anna Karenina. There are toys on the floor. There's food on the floor from all of the baby's meals and snacks today, the laundry's not folded, and there are dishes in the sink.
He gets off at midnight. Since it's 11:38, I've got a good fifteen minutes before I actually have to get up and do anything.

UPDATE: He came home fifteen minutes early! Eeek!

*I just switched the channel from Most Haunted to whatever the Food Network is showing. I was starting to get scared.